Monday, February 16, 2015

The One Where I Try Hinge - The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

It seems that everyone is on Tinder. Dating apps will likely replace sites in the next few years though I wasn't sure if they were for me. I was reading about a few different apps late last year and decided to give Hinge a try. The big selling point was that everyone was a friend of a friend or a third degree friend. You would see how you were connected on the app and since it was connected to Facebook the fake profile thing would be a moot point. I've come to learn this isn't much different than the way Tinder works other than I think this site has less of a "hook up" reputation. 

So have you tried Hinge? I'll tell you a little about my experience and you can decide for yourself if it is something for you. Don't worry, I have some stories for you too!

My experience
I would say that Hinge isn't too much different from a dating site. The biggest differences is that it is all through your phone and you know very little about the person before deciding if you are interested. I was very unsure about that at first as I like to try to size up someone a bit more before contacting them. I eventually got over it as you can't move forward to the next person until you either approve (heart) or eliminate (X) the last one. 

Of course this leads into a negative that it shares with dating sites but is magnified. You will match with tons of people you will never talk to. Neither side may reach out, you might receive an email and realize they aren't for you and vice versa. I don't find that I am meeting more or less people this way so it's pretty much a wash. Will I keep trying it? Sure, when I have some free time, want to play on my phone, and have caught up on my Facebook feed. It is a good distraction while waiting in line!

Now for my stories!

The Good....
I think that "good" should probably be in quote marks based on the result. Connected with an interesting guy the first of the year. We had a great phone conversation and I was actually looking forward to our date (if you know me, this is very rare). When we met up we had a really nice time and a rather long first date - probably five hours and multiple locations. My date was very affectionate - putting his arm around me, taking my hand when we were walking, etc. Not typical first date behavior but I thought we were hitting it off so I went with it. During our date he told me about another woman he had gone out with that thought he came on too strong. Should have been my red flag. We texted that night after our date and when texting about setting up another date he told me that he didn't feel enough chemistry with me. Okay, I might not have been his cup of tea, he might be dating lots of girls, etc but at LEAST come up with a better excuse than THAT! You don't spend that much time and show that much affection if you don't feel any chemistry. Hell, I've felt ZERO chemistry and gone out with guys again to see if after the awkwardness of the first date cleared if something might develop. Once it did so I always try to keep an open mind. Clearly there was something fishy going on with him and I'm pretty sure I dodged a bullet here. 

The Bad....
The first guy I went out with on Hinge seemed like he had a good head on his shoulders. We made plans and talked about meeting up in the Miracle Mile area - at least that's what I thought. As I was trying to make my way home in horrible traffic from a meeting in Santa Monica, we chatted about where we were going to meet that night. He acted like I had suggested Mars when I brought up Miracle Mile and then suggested Santa Monica. Are you kidding me? I just told you how I'm driving home from there now. Do you think I am going to turn around and drive right back? I tried to put that past me and we met in Beverly Hills instead. Nice enough guy, we shared some food, had some drinks and then he told me about his MOTHER ISSUES. Including all of his therapy that has helped him deal with them. Really? On a first date? I probably would have given him another chance (see above) but when my friend called and asked if I wanted to go to Yogurtland on the way home I realized I was about 1000% more excited about that. Neither of us called each other which I chalk up to a Hinge win!

The Ugly....
This guy was another early match on Hinge. Like many of these guys, he was a little lazy and would only respond to my emails but not start a conversation. I should have walked away then since later I couldn't silence him. We decided to move our communication off of Hinge and started texting. I was at the eye doctor with dilated eyes and told him we could just talk via phone that night. He still kept texting and suggested that while my vision was impaired was a great time for us to meet up. When I spoke with him that night, I got the impression that we just weren't likely to be all that compatible based on the things he was saying and how he was saying them. Both via email and on our call he was really pushing to get together that Saturday. I was already committed to something all day and into the evening but suggested we reconnect on Sunday to figure out when we could meet up. He texted me FOUR times on Saturday. Twice in the afternoon that said "Bungalow" (a bar in Santa Monica) and "Come Here". Then twice that night asking me how my night was including one at 2.30am.

After that I decided that my instincts were correct and this guy was not for me. When I didn't hear from him for a week or so I figured he got the hint. How wrong I was.... Over the course of the next two months, he friended me on Facebook twice (declined the first, blocked the second), emailed me through the app (blocked), and texted a few times including another 2.30am one that said "Come visit". Keep in mind I NEVER MET THIS GUY. Finally when he texted to wish me a "Happy New Year" I finally told him to stop texting me. Which he did - after he sent a few more texts to apologize and let me know he deleted my number. Not totally a stalker but what did this guy think he was going to accomplish? I hadn't responded to him in months!

So those are my stories. Everything else Hinge has been boring. Have you tried it out? What are your experiences?



Monday, February 2, 2015

Would you like to be his "portal to happiness?"

I really don't have too much to say about this one other than the fact that I had to use restraint when highlighting my favorite parts. Obviously English is not Emad's first language though weirdness might be! If you're like me and complain that all guys like to do these days is text message, then I'd like you to meet Emad! He would like to meet you in "the light of day in a public place". 


Meet Emad
Long Beach, CA | 52

I'm looking forward to meet with a lady who I can start to have a "committed long term" relationship- companionship. 

I'm a college graduate and am working as a professional. I'm drugs and dramas free, with no strings attached nor any hidden agendas. 


I'm a loyal friend and a fun person to be with, whom also has lots of sense of humor and makes you laugh, since, I don't take life too seriously. I’ve been told that am extremely honest and genuinely kind hearted. I've been always a "one woman's man"; likewise, truly know what I really want in a partner and am well decided.


Ultimately, I'm NOT here just to have fun as an internet freak; therefore, would NOT consider nor have time to become someone's text or email buddy.

You and I, are both here for the same reasons; therefore, I am certain that "I'll be someone's portal to happiness", as long as you are serious and are willing to take chances with me.

As an Average Man, would like to be encountered with a lady, who is competitive with me in her life style, as well as, her sexual needs and desires.


Above all, I am looking for a "honest human being", she should not be a model but be physically attractive (fit, slim with some little cushion here and there if that is called curvy) since, I am an admirer of beauty. 

I prefer her to be educated, and possibly with "no child", since I'm educated and have no child.
I like her to be trustworthy, loyal, family oriented, sociable, open-minded and Independent, but not too liberal.Have a "stable mind and be emotionally healthy", and knows what she really wants.
Ladies, please accept my apologies and appreciate me for being honest and straight forward, and DO NOT get me wrong for an arrogant, since the whole point to all this is to enjoy each other's company; therefore, if you are the one and are interested then do not hesitate to start communicating with me in English, Spanish, Farsi or love language.

Good luck to all seekers of love and companion.


AND an email from Emad...

Hello Pretty Lady;

I am interested to get to know you further for friendship , relationship and companionship, and NOT for one night stand; however, I appreciate if you could kindly consider to meet with me in the light of the day and in a public place , over maybe a coffee or a drink, to see if there is any chemistry between us and we feel each other, and hopefully if so, then we can make new arrangements for our future encounters...does this simple request make sense to you? Thank you. 

Best Regards, Emad